In our home, dinosaurs still roam. I’m\nnot afraid to admit it: we still use a landline. We like the\nreliability, and the cool fact that it almost never drops a call. \nAnd yes, we have an answering machine too. When I’m not looking for\na job (which is pretty much all the time), our answering machine\ngreeting is recreation for my inner child. \n<\/p>\n\n\n\n
For example, if you call, you might\nhear something like: \u201cI HAVE PICKLES IN MY NOSTRILS FOR YOUUUUU!!\u201d\n This one, of course is sung loudly to the tune of \u201cI have pickles\nin my nostrils for you.\u201d \n<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Another might be a rather forceful\nannouncement like: \u201cThis machine is for singing!! Please begin\nsinging after the tone!!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
And I change the greeting regularly.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Anyway, those who know us will leave a\nmessage. Those who don’t, well we don’t care! For many moons, we\nused the answering machine to screen our calls. Seems like\ntelemarketing calls are becoming more and more numerous; and we just\ndon’t like being bothered. Rather than get annoyed at the poor\nperson who calls (they are just trying to earn a living), we just got\nto a point where we quit answering until the answering machine kicks\nin. If we recognize the caller, we quick pick up and say hi.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
We finally got some caller ID\ncompatible phones a couple years ago. However, when I went to\nactivate this on our landline, the nice phone company person told me\nthere would be a charge for it. That was completely unacceptable…\nI mean sheesh!! We pay enough for unlimited long distance and all\nthat. Mind you, I do technology stuff for a living; and I knew full\nwell that caller ID was already present in the landline\ntechno-universe. So, I passed.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Enter the 2016 elections. Holy MOLY we\ngot bombarded with calls!! Since I hadn’t thought much about caller\nID for a few years, I thought I’d call the phone company again and\nsee what was up. Lo and behold, there was no longer a fee for caller\nID!! So fiddle dee dee, we have caller ID!! And this pleases me!! \n<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Those marketer kids are naughty… they\nhave software that will fake your area code so it looks like the call\nis coming from somewhere nearby. And for some reason, the calls\nalways get dropped before the answering machine turns on!! That’s\njust fine with us. \n<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Every once in awhile though, I get to\nfeeling a bit playful. I’ll answer the call and be completely silly,\nwhich of course drives the caller a bit nuts.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cHello Sir, I’m calling to warn you that your Microsoft certificate is about to expire.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cOh\nmy!! What do I do??\u201d \n<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cWell sir, are you near your computer?? And is it turned on?\u201c<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cYes,\nyes I am!1\u201d I tell them, but of course I’m not near and it isn’t\non.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cOK Sir, I want you to press the following keys so I may troubleshoot…\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n I\ndon’t give them the chance to finish and I blurt out, \u201cOH NO!! Do\nyou see my screen?? WHAT ARE YOU DOING??? I DON’T THINK I LIKE\nTHIS!!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n **CLICK**\n Oh darn, they hung up. \n<\/p>\n\n\n\n Another\ncaller fell victim to my silliness recently…<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cHello sir, I’m doing a customer service survey and I’d like to ask you…\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n I\ninterrupt: \u201cPizza??\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cNo no sir, this is a customer service survey. I’m not trying to sell you any food or other…\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cWell\nI’m pretty hungry, I’m hoping for some pizza!!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cSir!! Is there anyone in your home 18 or older I can speak to??\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cOh\nyes, my cat!! I’ll go get him for you!!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n **CLICK**\nOh darn, another hang up.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Anyway,\nwe really<\/strong><\/em>\nlike caller ID. Come to find out, there’s a telecommunications\nexpert who is providing a service to intercept telemarketers before\nthey even get to your phone!! And they record the call, which can be\nvery amusing. \n<\/p>\n\n\n\n Please\nenjoy the video that explains…<\/p>\n\n\n\n