Dear Mom (Nature),<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Please turn off the cooler in time for\nHallowe’en. Supposed to freeze again tonight, and according to The\nWeather People, there’s a possibility of rain and maybe even snow on\nHallowe’en. This does not amuse me. I would much prefer 60 degrees\nwith some sunshine until the sun goes down when the evening\napproaches sunset; which usually happens right after the sun goes\ndown in the evening when the darkness begins so we can go\ntrick-or-treating with the grandkids and not have to freeze our\nbazookeys off while they get lots of nice candy and we get to shiver\nand avoid moisture as it falls from the sky in an effort to moisten\nour nether regions while we conjure up a nice, scary run-on sentence.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Thank you.,<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Me, A Name I call Myself.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
——————————–<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Dear Home Owners,<\/p>\n\n\n\n
When we bring the grandkids to your\nhome, please toss in some extra chocolate for us older folks. We\nreally <\/strong><\/em>like chocolate. I know the old saying, \u201cvariety\nis the spice of life,\u201d but I’m pretty sure that refers to a variety\nof chocolaty yummy things that may or may not have nuts and other\nconfectionery remarkables. Also, since I am retiring in a few\nmonths, feel free to summon me just after the kids leave your house\nwith their goodies and offer me nice surprises like $20 bills and\nperhaps a few gift certificates to local stores. I promise not to\nthreaten to stomp your flower beds or try to teach your pets to speak\nGerman like I did last year.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Thank you,<\/p>\n\n\n\n A Very Humble Freckle Faced Old Fart<\/p>\n\n\n\n ——————————–<\/p>\n\n\n\n Dear Kids,<\/p>\n\n\n\n Thank GOD for all of youse youngsters!!\n How else would we get the opportunity to slosh around in rain and\nsnow and watch youse kids smile bigly as you get all the neat treats\nfrom all these houses? Oh what?? Yes, I did see that cool witch\ncostume that lady wore when she came to the door. Wait… say what??\n The guy in the brick house has skulls on his lawn that are all lit\nup?? Way cool. Do what now?? Oh… I saw that smashed pumpkin back\nthere, yeah… not sure why anyone would want to do that. Pardon\nme?? Wow, yeah!! You got quite a haul of goodies there.<\/p>\n\n\n\n So hey kids, you know what? Youse are\nthe reason for the season, when it comes right down to it. Thank you\nfor showing us \u201cadults\u201d how to have fun during any kind of\nweather. Actually, thank you all just for being who you are. We are\nvery fortunate to have you with us here on this planet.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Thank you,<\/p>\n\n\n\n Some Mooshy Old Geezer<\/p>\n\n\n\n P.S.: Got any chocolate?<\/p>\n\n\n\n