{"id":2211,"date":"2023-01-14T00:33:33","date_gmt":"2023-01-14T05:33:33","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/kakahead.com\/?p=2211"},"modified":"2023-01-14T00:33:33","modified_gmt":"2023-01-14T05:33:33","slug":"blithering-idiocy","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/kakahead.com\/?p=2211","title":{"rendered":"Blithering Idiocy"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p>We stole the grandsons from their parents tonight. The parents were not at all opposed to this, pretty sure they like a little alone time every now and then. Most of the time, we pick the boys up on a Friday evening, which as you all know is the day I wrote a story. Once upon a time, when our grandsons were much younger and more frivolous, I would beseech them to give me fodder for silly &#8220;Happy Friday!!!&#8221; stories. Alas, that time appears to be waning. Whether it be maturity (Huh?? What&#8217;s <em><strong>that<\/strong><\/em>??), or some sort of societal influence, I just don&#8217;t know. But for whatever reason, tonight pulling silliness from their noggins was more challenging than usual. These days, they&#8217;re laser focused on video games. That&#8217;s OK I suppose, but if they had their own way the games would be on 22.4 hours a day, 7 days a week. The remaining 1.6 hours would of course be reserved for eating and going to the bathroom. Anyway, shortly after we got to our house I asked them a favor.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>\u201cHey guys, put the devices down for a few&#8230; I need some nonsense sentences for Happy Friday,\u201d I announced. Their response: crickets. Figuratively speaking of course. In other words, they didn&#8217;t give me crickets, but when they stared at me silently with glazed eyes, I thought maybe some crickets should be singing in the background. I tried to kick things off.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>\u201cMy elbows don&#8217;t reach to the floor anymore;\u201d I blurted. Both of them smirked and chuckled a bit.<br><br>\u201cCheese,\u201d Ollie replied. Sounded like a good start&#8230; so I implored them to continue, but again, crickets. Then I suggested something truly fun (at least I enjoy it greatly):  opening the Notes app on the iPhone, and instead of typing, one presses the microphone icon and utters gibberish. Apparently, both boys were aghast at such a suggestion; as they both floundered and were unable to say anything silly. So again, I led the way.<br><br>My gibberish was transcribed into, \u201cMarcus, nap and phlegm painting and bad snow Chi Amo.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Then Ollie chimed in with a brief blurb, which became \u201cMatinee.\u201d \u201cGood!\u201d I exclaimed. Got anything else?<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>More crickets.<br><br>My turn again: \u201cThere&#8217;s no excuse for zucchini it doesn&#8217;t look anything like sheep.\u201d<br><br>Gabe finally ventured an unintentional contribution: \u201cI don&#8217;t have a word in my brain right now.\u201d<br><br>To my surprise, my Beautiful Girlfriend piped up, and the phone was sure she said, \u201cMinewood beach chocolate strawberries.\u201d<br><br>Then the phone picked up some random chatter: \u201cMyrtle verbal I don&#8217;t think it&#8217;s talking anymore. Oh there goes.\u201d<br><br>\u201cThe marsupial ate my friends lunch again,\u201d I added. \u201cAnd then the marsupial threw up,\u201d my Lovely Bride continued. To prevent the momentum from diminishing, I hit the microphone icon again and pointed at Gabe. He was speechless. I interjected, \u201cYou&#8217;re frightened of the phone? My nostrils are full of splinters again. Both of my egg shells ran away with the cheese maker!\u201d<br><br>Ollie busted out with some more gibberish, which was transformed to \u201cTap the top sick restart.\u201d Then he paused momentarily and dug up something on his phone: \u201cThe top 16 words that start with H are hack, handy, holy, humane, hilarious, handsome, handsomely, halo, heartening, heavenly, hunk, honorable, hood, humble, heart, and husband.\u201d<br><br>\u201cMy husband is a coffee pot!\u201d I replied. And finished the composition with that old saying that <em><strong>everyone <\/strong><\/em>knows: Snake snot slithers silently, stupendously, and stinky.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Whew!! That&#8217;s enough for one day, don&#8217;t you think??<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Well except of course for the video fun&#8230;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<figure class=\"wp-block-embed is-type-video is-provider-youtube wp-block-embed-youtube wp-embed-aspect-4-3 wp-has-aspect-ratio\"><div class=\"wp-block-embed__wrapper\">\n<iframe loading=\"lazy\" title=\"1930. Night\" width=\"584\" height=\"438\" src=\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/embed\/gyvBb0LUTKw?feature=oembed\" frameborder=\"0\" allow=\"accelerometer; autoplay; clipboard-write; encrypted-media; gyroscope; picture-in-picture; web-share\" referrerpolicy=\"strict-origin-when-cross-origin\" allowfullscreen><\/iframe>\n<\/div><\/figure>\n\n\n\n<p><\/p>\n\n\n\n<figure class=\"wp-block-embed is-type-video is-provider-youtube wp-block-embed-youtube wp-embed-aspect-4-3 wp-has-aspect-ratio\"><div class=\"wp-block-embed__wrapper\">\n<iframe loading=\"lazy\" title=\"The Haunted Ship   -  Van Beuren Studios  (1930)\" width=\"584\" height=\"438\" src=\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/embed\/shYczU9AbMo?feature=oembed\" frameborder=\"0\" allow=\"accelerometer; autoplay; clipboard-write; encrypted-media; gyroscope; picture-in-picture; web-share\" referrerpolicy=\"strict-origin-when-cross-origin\" allowfullscreen><\/iframe>\n<\/div><\/figure>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>We stole the grandsons from their parents tonight. The parents were not at all opposed to this, pretty sure they like a little alone time every now and then. Most of the time, we pick the boys up on a &hellip; <a href=\"http:\/\/kakahead.com\/?p=2211\">Continue reading <span class=\"meta-nav\">&rarr;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[2,3],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-2211","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-happy-friday","category-pure-silliness"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/kakahead.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2211","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/kakahead.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/kakahead.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/kakahead.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/kakahead.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=2211"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"http:\/\/kakahead.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2211\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":2214,"href":"http:\/\/kakahead.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2211\/revisions\/2214"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/kakahead.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=2211"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/kakahead.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=2211"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/kakahead.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=2211"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}