My friend Duane had a way with words. When talking about how quickly the years fly past us, he often said, “well you know what frogs say: time’s fun when you’re having flies!” Boy ain’t that the truth. Now that I’m an old fart, I can mention stuff like that to new parents.. “You know, now that you’re a Mom, your life will flash before your eyes. She’s 7 weeks old now, but the day after tomorrow she’ll be asking for the car keys.” I’m pretty sure that anyone who has ever had kids can relate. They grow up almost instantly; or so it seems.

So here we have 2022 on the horizon. Sheesh!! Seems like just last month The Beatles were arriving in the US on the Mayflower!! And they were on TV in glorious black and white!! No cell phones, no personal computers, just crazy stuff like record players and radios!! HOW DID WE EVER SURVIVE??

We did pretty well really. By today’s standards, life seemed much simpler. Communication was much different; because people actually listened to each other rather than texting and talking at the same time. If someone texted while driving in those days, it meant they were writing something while at the wheel. Just as bad an idea as today’s cell phone texting really. Probably even worse! If you crashed, besides all the other owies you could end up with a pencil stuffed way up inside your nostrils!! Anyway, in spite of all the changes in technology; things haven’t really changed much. We just hear about it all much more quickly.

Oh!!  And there were these things called science and facts.   People knew the difference between truth and lies.  And when scientists and doctors warned us about stuff in the interest of our safety; we believed what they said.  We trusted them to give us the real deal; because we knew they really cared about us.

Anyway, rather than bore you with too much “then vs. now” nostalgia or crying about all the woes of the world, I’d like to throw out my newly printed, fresh off the press New Year’s Revolutions that I may or may not try to practice during the upcoming year.  So here they are, and I would strongly encourage all of you to examine these carefully and then run away laughing (or screaming, depending on your mood):

1) Since food is my current drug of choice, I resolve to go to the store and buy it. Well OK, I’ll go to the farmers market a few times too… Oh, and I still have some carrots and German Smooth Kale (fancy talk for wild cabbage) out in the garden; those should be pretty yummy. I’m just gonna eat, OK?

T) This is the year I’m gonna try something different!! I just don’t know what it is yet.

1a) Remember that food thing I was talking about? I really like food. I was wondering if you’d please sign me up for the Pizza of the Week Club.  As a gift, you know… where they bring you fantastic brick oven baked pizza every week.  What??  Nobody does that??

FINE!!  Let’s move on…

9) Do you remember that one time when we said we were gonna do that one really cool thing? Boy that was a great time, wasn’t it? You remember?? Um… neither do I.

Blue) I really need to quit wearing my undies on my head in public.

&) When the robins come back, I will welcome them nicely rather than telling them tasteless jokes like last year.

0#) Did you ever find the term “jelly beans” amusing? Me neither. But I’m determined to discover just where they come from. My experiment for this year’s garden: cross pollinate pole beans with a few jars of strawberry preserves. I’ll keep you informed.

And least but not less:  Here’s a real one.  I’ve already started this really…

pX) I’m going to spend less time on social media (like BookFace) and more time facing actual people in real live social ways while living my life in a state of electronicless bliss.  At least some of the time.  Don’t get me wrong, I love checking in on my friends’ posts on the interwebs.  Unfortunately, however, some folks that I have known and loved are hell bent on embracing conspiracy theories and ignoring truth and science.  Because I love them, I will not “unfriend” them.  Rather, I employ a mental health technique and “unfollow” them.  This allows only friendly vibes to appear on my BookFace feed.  But hey, too much is too much.  I’m pretty good at the too muchness; so less much I think is much better for me than too much muchness.  I’ve encountered folks who think they told me about something and I didn’t hear it; and then they harrumph a little and say, “I messaged you about it on BookFace!!”  Well that makes me feel kinda sad… for them!  Sorry kids, but I’m not gonna allow social media to run my universe.

Just sayin’…

Well I could go on and on, but I’d better stop there I think. Hope you all had a Merry Christmas, and that you have a very Happy New Year. If that greeting is too politically incorrect for you, please just have a Happy Merry and a Joyful Wonderful.

Peace, Love, and Jelly Beans to all, and to all a good night.  And speaking of social media… here’s a little thingy that you can give a loved one who spends too much time with their eyeballs glued to a screen.