You may not know this, but we are on vacation and you are not. I’m on vacation!! Nyaa nyaa na boo boo!! Not you!! Unless you are, of course, in which case we can be on vacation in separate places together. Of course, these days I am always on vacation because I am retired. However, my Beautiful Girlfriend are going on a little trip to an outdoor rock concert. We will be enjoying the wonderful electrically amplified songs from Blue Oyster Hat and Fog Cult. Or is that Blue Fog Cult and Oyster Hat?? Blue Oyster Cult?? Foghat?? No, those sound way to silly. I’ve asked a few young people, and also some old farts like me, if they’ve ever heard of any such groups as these, and they shake their heads and run away screaming.
Too bad for them. We are gonna have FUN!!
Retirement is truly a blessing. There are, however, a few anomalies that arise when one is retired, such as:
1) I often forget what day it is. But I don’t care!!
R) I often get to sleep in to at least 8:36 AM
5) I’ve learned that time passes even more quickly than when I was working!! Seems like my retirement countdown clock was just a tickin’ away like a week or so ago. Now I’ve been retired for two years and two months!! Holy moly!!
M) I really should have plenty of time, but my garden still looks like the Garden of Weeden. Sure, we’re gonna get lots of food. But one “disadvantage” of practicing regenerative farming (making amazing soil using natural means) is that when you have excellent soil, the weeds do really well!! So something that’s always on my list is the next item…
Red) I hope to get my garden weeded.
Did I mention I’d like go get my garden weeded? Oh yes, yes indeed.
OK, you see it’s like this: I got my tomato, pepper, and eggplant transplants all in the ground in early May, and sure it can still get cold but I keep hats (well OK, buckets) handy to put over their heads to keep Jack Frost away but then I discovered the seeds don’t march themselves into the ground to grow food plants, so then I nee need to get off my hiney and get out there and make the dirt move in certain ways in order to plant kernels of radish bulbs and transplant the onion vines and oh wow don’t forget the baby Watermelon Trees that have to be hung out to dry for 3 weeks before those doggoned Space Aliens come back and start trying to reprogram our garage door opener again when they could have just asked me for a nut cracker because I have one over here and it works well but you know those Space Aliens don’t have very strong fingers and I tried to tell them that the garage door won’t really crack nuts but they won’t listen and maybe this is not what I really meant to write about; and after all I’m not really sure Space Aliens should be Capitalized but I Did It Anyway and *whew* OK that’s enough.
Often, I ask my Beautiful Girlfriend not to make any plans for me so I can get all this planting ans weeding done.. And you know what? She is so nice to me… but people want to see us (and we want to see them) so often schedule time with friends. But hey, it’s nice to be wanted!! Besides, plans are basically wishes when you look at the grand scheme of things. We never know what a particular day will bring; so just rolling along without barking and making snargly noises is really the most serene way I’ve found to enjoy each day to the fullest. And as a wise person once told me, “If you wanna make God laugh, tell Him you have plans.” Well I dunno that God is just a Him… I don’t really think so, but I can see the humor in the whole “tell Them you have plans thing; don’tcha know.
So I have all these grandiose plans to plant plants and pull weeds; help them grow in a kind and loving way, and then chop their delicious bodies up for food. I also intend also to murder some plants too by golly. There are some trees that could come down, and some weeds that are already enjoying too much garden real estate.
Therefore, I will continue to enjoy retirement in the manner of a very long vacation with added chores and garden work and all kinds of other working but not actually working for someone, but it’s still work, so am I really retired or is this just some kind of weird run-on sentence that really never resolves whether I’m actually retired or on some kind of weird, reduced pay vacation???
OK, I hereby proclaim it: I’m on vacation. Are you?
No you are not: unless of course you are.
No, just me.
Nyaa nyaa na boo boo!!
We’ve toyed with the idea of a camping trailer… but the cost, maintenance, storage and other issues have made us reconsider. Besides, we don’t wanna end up like these guys…